20 Lessons I’ve Learned in 20 Years

Recently I turned 20 and I took the time to reflect on the lessons I’ve learned up to this point. 

Of course there’s probably more than 20 lessons I could put on the list, but for the sake of time here’s 20 lessons I thought stood out:

ONE: the importance of knowing my values.

Knowing your core values is important. They help you make small and sometimes detrimental decisions in your life. 

TWO: I have to be my #1 fan.

I don’t depend on outward validation from friends and family when it comes to the things I want to pursue in life because at the end of the day I believe in myself and my abilities; family and friends just add to that predetermined belief. 

THREE: everyone is not meant to be like or think like me. 

FOUR: it’s really the little things.

I’ve come to appreciate the small things that bring me joy and I try to cultivate those joys in my day to day life.

FIVE: All friends are not meant to be permanent.

This was a particular hard pill to swallow due to the fact that I value longevity and depth with my relationships, but sometimes friends are seasonal and that’s okay.

SIX: Run my own race.

I still struggle with comparison, but it’s gotten much better at this point. 

Every time I feel the need to compare myself to somebody else, I remember this quote by motivational speaker Gary Vee, “every second you spend thinking about what somebody else has is taking away from time that you can create something for yourself.” 

SEVEN: stop resisting change.

It’s cliche and I’m even cringing as I’m typing this, but I had to learn that change is the only constant in life. 

EIGHT: quality friends over quantity.

Going deeper with a few friends rather than being in friendships with everyone I come into contact with allows me to connect on a deeper level. 

NINE: I’m never going to have all the answers.

TEN: the relationship I have with myself is one of the most important ones I’ll ever have.

I nurture the relationship I have with myself just like any other relationship. 

ELEVEN: a healthy lifestyle is determined by what you do consistently.

TWELVE: do what is right for me.

Everyone’s way of going about things will always be different so I learned to value my own opinion and trust my intuition.

THIRTEEN: I have to allow myself to make mistakes.

I’m a recovering perfectionist. I’m still working out a few kinks but I’ve become significantly more open to allowing myself to value progress over perfection. 

FOURTEEN: support businesses that align with my values.

FIFTEEN: good and worthwhile things take time. 

I’ve learned to fall in love with the process of things more than the results. Patience really is a virtue.  

SIXTEEN: make time for the things I love.

SEVENTEEN: be attentive to synchronicity; it is the language of God. 

I think God speaks to people in different ways and since I’m naturally an observant person, He speaks to me through synchronized events.  

EIGHTEEN: experiences over material gain any day. 

NINETEEN:  Boundaries are my best friend.

If I don’t have boundaries in different areas of my life, I leave it fair game for anybody to dictate the direction of my life and I’m not here for that. 

TWENTY: learning meets us at the right time. 

My last lesson can be summed up in a quote by author and speaker Robin Sharma, “we only hear what we’re ready to hear. All learning meets us exactly where we’re at. And as we grow greater, we understand better.” 

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