Sometimes I find myself reminiscing on the past.
Reminiscing on memories can be healthy when reflecting for improvement or refreshing when reflecting for pure enjoyment; however, there’s a healthy balance that needs to happen when journeying into the past because one could get caught up in the illusion that things were better than they actually were or could have been better if events played out differently.
Visiting the past can sometimes be like getting trapped in a hole of quicksand. A pit of quicksand is disguised as solid ground — safe to walk across, but as soon as you step on this seemingly safe patch, the sand gives way and drags you down, eventually trapping you.
Everyone’s relationship with their past is different. Some despise it, some are cordial and some tend to play up or romanticize it.
I tend to fall into the last category of romanticizing my past. I like to convince myself that things were better than they actually were, often comparing my now to then, and wishing I could return there.
I unconsciously gloss over my regrets and suppress the bad moments, only focusing on the positive memories I’ve made. The positive memories are then amped up, making it seem as if my previous years of existence were the best years of my life (which I can safely and humbly say weren’t).
I find comfort in what has already happened because living in the present takes mindfulness and thinking about the future sometimes creates anxiety, so my default is to go to a time that I know well.
In the song “Good Old Days” by Macklemore, the lyric “Maybe we always look back and think it was better than it was” is a truth for many of us.
We forget that we have the opportunity to appreciate the past in all of its beauty while also creating new memories in the here and now. When we’re focused on creating new experiences to value, it’s hard to romanticize the past because you can romanticize the now.
In the times that I catch myself wishing I could return to the “good ole days”, I first remind myself of the reality of my past memories — things didn’t happen exactly the way I remember because memories have a tendency to make colorful edits overtime. Secondly, I remind myself that I can create even more beautiful experiences if I just let go of what was and focus on what is.
That’s why I think journaling or creating docu-videos can serve your future self well because it gives perspective of where your mind was, how you carried yourself and a realistic lens of your past.
Revisiting memories is ultimately how we learn, grow and appreciate how far we’ve come. They are reminders of what brought us joy and what didn’t serve us so that we can make changes in the present moment.
The present moment is all we really have, so make the most of it.
For more “inner dialogues”, click here.
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